It’s true, I said, I’m musically promiscuous
but I thought you were too?
Surely we belong together?
What a gorgeous catastrophe,
you replied, how we flamenco like this
but never meet, not really.
Then let’s rewrite the script, I urged
let’s go one cerulean afternoon
to the cottonwoods
where the bees wallow
and make like a samba in the zinnias.
No one need ever know! Besides
I wore my peignoir for you
and the moment is already cyanic.
You give me some kind of all-overishness
damn you! you declared, but got up
gruntled, took my hand
and led me there.
© N Nazir 2023
Written for Shay’s Word Garden where Shay brings us inspiration with award-winning poet Alicia Suskin Ostriker, with the word list taken from her poetry collection The Crack in Everything (words used: gorgeous, catastrophe, flamenco, cerulean, cottonwoods, bees, samba, zinnias).
Written also for Sammi Scribbles Writing Prompt: Script, 100 words.
*This is really a belated Throwback Thursday 🙂 But has also been my earworm this week.
This is wonderful, Sunra! It feels light and fun and you use the words so inventively and beautifully. I love how the bees wallow and I love that you use “gruntled”. It’s a favourite joke between my Dad and I to use words without their usual prefixes like that.
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Thank you, Worms! Glad you like it 🙂 That’s a great game! The thing is, words like that are all legit but no one really uses them except in the negative. It’s the first time I’ve used gruntled, though! 🙂
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“A samba in the zinnias”? Love it!Excellent work, through and through, Sunra. Thank you for sharing.
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Ha ha, thank you, Michael! Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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I’m going to start describing myself as musically promiscuous – it is such a good phrase
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Ha ha, thanks JYP! You heard it here first! 🙂
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I think I’m in love with this poem, Sunra ❤
~David
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Thank you, David! ❤ I'm delighted!
Btw, I tried to include your prompt but just couldn't without compromising the poem. I look forward to your next prompt though 🙂
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🤗
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What a stupendous collection of scintillating words woven in a delightful manner and, to top it off, a marvellous early video of Cream!
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Ha ha! Thanks so much, Peter! Cause every poem should have a happy ending, right? 😀
Your comment is also stupendous, my friend. And that song is a banger, I love it!
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Oh, look at that, my bodice is ripped. Wonder how that happened? 😛
This is so much fun and chock full of Sunra-isms like “all-overishness.” I think the musically promiscuous (or Song Slut as i like to call myself!) get more out of life and certainly more out of their playlists. From the title to the last line, this is just a pleasure to read on a Sunday morning.
Re: the song. I was too little to be aware of Cream at the time, but several years later I was wandering around the college bookstore and found Cream’s first album and bought it. IIRC this was the opening track. I love that entire album still to this day. One benefit, I suppose, of having been more interested in playing jacks and watching Gilligan’s Island than in counterculture, was the opportunity to discover all that fantastic music after the fact. Like something? They probably have a back catalog of ten albums! Anyway, “I Feel Free” is such a good song. Belinda Carlisle did it in the 80s or 90s, too.
Happy weekend, woman!
–Shay
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Ha ha ha! Thanks so much, Shay! I’ve got to give credit to your list for such great words to play with – I mean, cerulean is one of my favourite blues. And all the musical references which helped pace the poem along. I love that you think “all-overishness” is a Sunra-ism, I wish it was! It’s actually an archaic word no one uses any more to describe a feeling of unease. I’m trying to bring all the old words back!
And I hear you, I too wasn’t very familiar with Cream, in fact, I only know a handful of their songs, but an old school friend once included this song on a mix tape she did for me in the 90s and I’ve loved the song ever since. I mean, those winsome harmonies are just exquisite?! Who sings like that on rock songs any more?
Happy weekend to you too, my friend!
❤
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Awesome write!
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Thank you, VJ! 🙂
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You are welcome
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Such a delightful poem. I love those three stanzas in the middle, they make me want to kick off my shoes and dance in the meadow!
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Thanks so much, sgeoil! I’m delighted it had that effect on you! 🙂
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You’re welcome.
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Well done, Sunra. Creatively composed and complex. 🙂
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Thank you, Bill! Appreciated 🙂
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Wonder. And what fun! Love all the word play and playfulness.
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Thank you, Bob! I’m pleased you enjoyed it! 🙂
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I meant …Wonderful.
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I assumed so 🙂
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How great is this: ” I’m musically promiscuous / but I thought you were too?” And “make like a samba in the zinnias” indeed!!
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Ha ha, thanks qbit! 🙂
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Loved what you did with this one 🙂
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Thank you, poetisatinta! 💛
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you are welcome 🙂
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You had me at “musically promiscuous!” Such a wonderful poem filled with so many good lines. Well done!
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Thank you for your kind words, Bridgette! So glad you think so 🙂
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This is really clever. I especially like the word “gruntled”. Smiles.
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Thank you, Sherry! 🙂
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“musically promiscuous” i love that!
liked your wording, i like how the word cyanic sounds a bit like “chaotic”, adds to the meaning and tone of the poem… this was fun to read.
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Hey, thanks Phillip! 🌟 Appreciate your thoughtful comment, glad you found it fun!
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Fabulous poetry, Sunra. 🙂
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Thank you, Kitty! 🌟
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